Initially posted on Mic and cross-posted here using their authorization.
As a proud man that is bisexual for a long time, IвЂ™ve needed to navigate the complicated grey area that my identification occupies regarding the sex range.
Despite every one of the gains the LGBTQIA+ community has made, bisexual individuals are nevertheless looked at with confusion вЂ” or outright scorn вЂ” by gays, lesbians, and right individuals alike. From people asking me personally if I became вЂњfull-blown gay yetвЂќ to individuals questioning my motivations, IвЂ™ve probably heard all of it.
Regrettably, the way that is binary of that informs the reasoning of several whom remain unconvinced by the truth of bisexuality finally oppresses everybody else through its perpetuation of unflinching heteronormative or homonormative requirements.
Being intimate with some body of the identical intercourse does not suggest youвЂ™re homosexual, similar to being intimate with somebody associated with the opposing intercourse does not mean youвЂ™re straight вЂ” it just means you fall someplace in the wonderful, fluid spectral range of sex.
right Here we have been when you look at the supposedly enlightened 12 months of 2014 вЂ“ yet, biphobia persists. In no specific purchase, here are some of the very most tiresome lies culture actually has to stop telling concerning the bisexual community.
1. вЂњBisexual individuals donвЂ™t exist.вЂќ
This is basically the lie that is first bisexuality вЂ” plus itвЂ™s a huge one.
Some into the gay and community that is straight canвЂ™t fathom a sex by which people are interested in several sex. Fundamentally, you can look at the waters, you must choose a part, the reasoning goes.
But bisexual individuals donвЂ™t need lesbians and gays to verify or science to show which they occur.
2. вЂњBisexual individuals are simply dealing with a stage.вЂќ
Yes, it really is real that an abundance of gays and lesbians purchased bisexuality as being a stone that is stepping a option to soften the blow of being released for conservative moms and dads.
While being released is an extremely individual choice, the techniques of some must not invalidate the identities of this bulk.
3. вЂњBisexual individuals are intimately greedy.вЂќ
Bisexual individuals are maybe not immediately more promiscuous than just about every other person вЂ” gay or directly. Being drawn to significantly more than one sex does offer more partners that are potential.
But simply as having an eclectic style in wines will not make one an alcoholic, being bisexual doesn’t make you more promiscuous. However, if some body is, thereвЂ™s absolutely nothing incorrect with that either. (LetвЂ™s maybe perhaps not participate in slut-shaming!)
4. вЂњBisexual individuals are cheaters.вЂќ
A cheater is just a cheater.
Bisexual people cheat, and so do individuals who identify otherwise.
Their sex doesnвЂ™t make them cheat; impulse control, bad decision-making abilities, or deficiencies in consideration with regards to their partner do.
5. вЂњAll bisexual people are polyamorous.вЂќ
While polyamory may stereotypically appear more predominant within the queer community, there is absolutely no difficult information that ties polyamory more right to the bisexual community than just about some other orientation.
That form of relationship framework is not attached with any provided sex. ItвЂ™s a choice that is personalas well as for some, it is more natural).
6. вЂњBisexual folks are afraid of dedication.вЂќ
Being interested in both genders doesnвЂ™t have such a thing to do with dedication.
Alan Cumming addressed this myth in a candid meeting this past year:
вЂњi’ve a healthier sexual appetite and a healthier imagination,вЂќ Cumming told Instinct mag. вЂњwe nevertheless determine myself as a bisexual despite the fact that i’ve opted for become with give. IвЂ™m sexually interested in the feminine type also I just believe that bisexual folks have a negative rap. though i will be with a guy, andвЂќ
7. вЂњAll women can be bisexual.вЂќ
The sexualization of females understands no bounds in todayвЂ™s culture that is contemporary.
But simply because mags plus the activity industry continue steadily to exploit hypersexuality that is female a clear try to offer services and products does not signify all ladies swing both methods a la Shakira and Rihanna in вЂњCanвЂ™t make sure to Forget YouвЂќ вЂ” sorry Shakira, weвЂ™re maybe not purchasing exactly exactly what those lying sides are available.
8. вЂњBisexual individuals are drawn to something that techniques.вЂќ
Oh, please. Simply because some body is bisexual does not mean they donвЂ™t have actually criteria.
9. вЂњBisexual folks are just interested in binary genders.вЂќ
Respected bisexual activist Robyn Ochs defines bisexuality whilst the potential вЂњto be attracted вЂ” romantically and/or sexually вЂ” to folks of one or more intercourse and/or sex, certainly not at exactly the same time, certainly not in the same manner, rather than always towards the exact same level.вЂќ
Therefore no, it is maybe perhaps maybe not concerning the binary, people.
10. вЂњBisexual individuals spread HIV.вЂќ
Guys that have intercourse with guys are in a risk that is disproportionate of disease. But that doesnвЂ™t make people that are bisexual have actually HIV almost certainly going to distribute the disease вЂ” using the appropriate precautions is important irrespective of your intimate orientation.
Always utilize security; know your partnerвЂ™s status as well as your very own.
11. вЂњBisexual individuals live for threesomes.вЂќ
Threesomes aren’t a hallmark of this lifestyle that is bisexual.
They truly are just an alternative, just like they truly are for just about any other being that is sexual.
12. вЂњBi-erasure is a misconception.вЂќ
In reality, bay area Human Rights Commission circulated a 50-page report on bi-invisibility in the LGBTQIA+ community, demonstrating that the event is alive and well.
As detailed by the commission, verbiage such as for instance вЂњgay marriageвЂњhomosexuality orвЂќвЂќ arenвЂ™t inclusive and erase bisexualвЂ™s identification.
13. вЂњBisexual folks are a tiny community.вЂќ
A full 48.9% in 2007, a survey of 768 self-identified lesbians, gays and bisexual individuals discovered that almost half defined as bisexual вЂ” that is.
Bisexual people may well not talk down up to their lesbian and homosexual siblings, but this can be more because of lingering stigmas than it is always to sheer power.
ItвЂ™s here to stay like it or not, the bisexual community is here, and.